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Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
1/07/2022 9:14 pm
2033 National Football League Playoffs

After a decisive Christmas Day Dark Horses of Destiny round shed more light upon the 2033 NFL playoff picture, we find football fandom frothing at the betting booths eagerly awaiting the round of eight.

In the American league, this week’s action starts in Pittsburgh (trslick)(-14). Pittsburgh, the #1 seed in the AFC and in total league penalties, will face 6th seeded Indianapolis (CrazyRazor). Indy, which crushed touchdown favored Jacksonville 17-3 (BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5317) on the heels of 46 rushing attempts, can only hope they can dance their way to the next round.

The second game of the weekend is a tasty platter of new hors d'owners to the NFL, served up in the classiest casino in Vegas - Allegiant Stadium, features 8 point underdog Los Angeles (A)(GrandadB) hoping to beat the house against the Las Vegas Raiders (raidergreg69). The Raaaaiiiiiders, who trashed 7th seeded Cleveland (drews14) (BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5318) 37-3, look to continue the walloping 527 net offensive yard production against one of the league’s stronger defenses. No one’s really sure who the favorite is, but none of the state licensed tellers will take crypto effective close of the January 7th trading day.

On Sunday, we’re treated to an opening all-u-can eat breakfast for the West Coast, as there will be plenty of time to eat by the time the ball tips off in Albuquerque at 1:20 PM PST. The #1 seeded Nukes (CrazySexyBeast), no strangers to the NFL playoffs with 14 straight appearances, are looking to drop the bomb on #5 Minnesota (Gackman) at the Kiva. Minnesota, making their third straight playoff appearance, are looking to provide some heat of their own after scraping by favored San Francisco in overtime 6-3 (BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5319).
At the Friday Zoom conference, Albuquerque head coach Benjamin Hart proudly boasted: “We are definitely keeping an eye on their hotel staff… It’s important to us to welcome Minnesota to New Mexico with nothing but our finest chiles - which we proudly included in every dish available through room service. Yes. Every dish. We also made sure to stock plenty of V8 and prune juice in every fridge to help keep them hydrated. Yes. Only those. Unfortunately, our supplies were low (Complete with finger quotes) and the ‘Rona is high. That’s why NFL rules prohibit any outside persons from entering the hotel property and any inside persons from leaving it. With that, He pounded a few Prilosecs and logged off, taking no questions. Not one.

The last game of the Eager Eight brings us to the Windy City of Chicago, where #3 Philadelphia (vcr515) hopes to cream the cheese out of second seeded Chicago (brxnivy). Philadelphia, led by a historical rushing attack that destroyed numerous long standing NFL records and scored 546 points during the regular season, seems well prepared to take on any weather that Chicago can throw on the field. Chicago had its day, though, not so gently ending the South Brisbane Raiders (adamaneeka) season 33-0 (BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5321) while putting up an impressive 403 yard day in offensive efforts.

After watching Philly crush #6 Dallas 42-6 in the opening round (BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5320), Chicago head coach Dan Hadley (125-101-2 career) felt confident in his team.
“Look, folks, it’s quite clear we’ve been able to handle everything that’s come our way this season. We’ve got two pounding backs who make quite the beast of their own. Just wait, they’ll see what kind of **** we’ll unleash. We’ll show up. Don’t worry.”

Alfred E. Neuman - it might be time to hedge your bets.

2033 EAGER EIGHT BRACKET:




Currently @ 2033 Eager Eight Playoff Round
League is in its 16th season.
Custom team options available.

Available Teams: (6)
American Conference
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Baltimore: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/9
Jacksonville: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/14

National Conference
Dallas: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/17
Seattle: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/24
New Orleans: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/30

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

Now is the time to plan greatness.
Get in while the getting is still good!
League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337
Last edited at 1/07/2022 10:05 pm

Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
1/11/2022 4:27 pm
2033 National Football League Playoffs: Furious Four

Greetings and salutations to all of the football nation, for our weekend deviations have brought us to the 2033 NFL Furious Four. After the frenetic footwork of the league's finest backs in the Eager Eight, only Los Angeles (A) (GrandadB), Pittsburgh (trslick), Albuquerque (CrazySexyBeast) and Philadelphia (vcr5150) remain.

Saturday’s action brings us to the bridge capital of the world, Pittsburgh. Oh. Bridges. Such joys. Favored by 9, Pitt looks to keep milling it’s way to the Crown after defeating Indianapolis (CrazyRazor) 21-16 (BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5322). Los Angeles (A), coming off a defensive 6-3 victory over the Las Vegas Raiders (raidergreg69) (BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5323), is again hoping to defensively dominate on the gridiron against Pittsburgh’s balanced offensive attack. On press day, LA (A) Defensive Coordinator Joseph Baldwin quipped: “8 sacks, 6 hurries, and 4 interceptions in the playoffs this year. I’m confident my guys can handle Pittsturd. No, I did not misspeak. Where here to flush them out of the playoffs. Period.”

On Sunday, we’ll find Philadelphia traveling to the Land of Entrapment… errr, Enchantment to face off against the Albuquerque Nukes. Neither team is a stranger to the playoffs, or to each other. Heck, they probably have matching sweater outfits at this point as this year’s Furious Four is the 7th consecutive playoff meeting between the two teams. Going back to 2026, the Nukes lead the series 5-2 and are favored by 1. It’s important to note that they’ve split 2-2 with an overtime game the previous 4 playoff meetings. It’s a definitive matchup of the NFL’s best passing offense against the league's best running offense, and third downs are sure to be the key to victory. Bet the over.

Pavlov already won. Tune in next week.







Currently @ 2033 Furious Four Playoff Round
League is in its 16th season.
Custom team options available.

Available Teams: (6)
American Conference
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Baltimore: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/9
Jacksonville: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/14

National Conference
Dallas: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/17
Seattle: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/24
New Orleans: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/30

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

Now is the time to plan greatness.
Get in while the getting is still good!
League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337

We so want ewe. We want ewe so bad. So bad.
Last edited at 1/11/2022 4:31 pm

Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
1/13/2022 8:33 pm
2033 National Football League Playoffs: The Crown Showdown

After a brutal Furious Four weekend for all teams involved, only Los Angeles (A) (GrandadB) and the Albuquerque Nukes (CrazySexyBeast) remain to battle in the 2033 Crown Showdown. The tickets have been emailed to an unknown number of random winners who will be lucky enough to attend in person, with NDA’s signed by everyone involved, and the fans and teams are on their way to whatever surprise destination the NFL Crown Showdown will be played at to conclude the 2033 season. …Or may have already arrived. We really don’t know once the planes leave.

Representing the National Conference, Albuquerque is in familiar territory against a new predator. After escaping against Philadelphia (vcr5150) at home 18-17 by scoring 9 points in the final three minutes of the game (WATCH: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/watch/5327#912332), the Nukes know they will have to perform better against a Los Angeles (A) team run by a new GM (BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5327).
Los Angeles (A), returning to the Crown Showdown for the first time since a 2024 victory, took advantage of Pittsburgh’s (trslick) aerial assault by nabbing 4 interceptions and 5 sacks.

Walking off the field with a 10-3 win (BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5326) and having scored the final touchdown on a 1 yard prance with 1:36 remaining in the game, LA(A) WR John Bennett said “We call that FARTWIPERIGHT, and I just snuck into the endzone - silent but deadly. Nothing but dust, baby. Tell Grams I love her."

Nukes favored by 7, likely due to an overwhelming abundance of familiarity with flatulence.
Red or Green?





Currently @ 2033 Crown Showdown
League is in its 16th season.
Custom team options available.

Available Teams: (5)
American Conference
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Baltimore: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/9

National Conference
Dallas: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/17
Los Angeles (N): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/22
New Orleans: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/30

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

Achieve.
League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337

Last edited at 1/13/2022 8:57 pm

Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
1/16/2022 3:20 pm
2033 National Football League Playoffs: The Crown Showdown Final

It was a beautiful, 75F day in Miami as the Los Angeles (A) (GrandadB) took the field to face the Albuquerque Nukes (CrazySexyBeast) before an announced crowd of 72,271.
With Billy and the Boingers reuniting for the halftime show, everybody was ready to rock and roll.

The game started quietly, though. As each team struggled to find an offensive groove, LA (A) led going into the 2nd quarter 3-0. With only 107 total offensive yards produced by the two contenders, along with 4 punts and an interception by Albuquerque’s QB Martin Wagner (his first of 3 on the day to go with 4 touchdowns), the attending masses had consumed every kernel of popcorn available in Miami-Dade County and a walloping 6,000 kegs of beer. It was quite clear that things could only get more interesting as the afternoon wore on.

Not to be deterred, Wagner took the ball with authority on the Nukes’ first possession of the 2nd quarter, driving 75 yards in 8 plays for the first touchdown of the Crown Showdown. With Martin going 4-4 with 69 yards and another 7 on a QB run, ABQ’s WR Willie Patterson caught the fry basket for 6 on a 35 yard HB Flare (DRIVE FILM: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/watch/5328#912395). Albuquerque’s D was not to be out-shined, and on LA (A)’s next offensive play, nabbed the interception at the LA (A) 25. The nukes quickly dropped down a clock consuming 6 play/34 yard drive for another 7 points, bringing them into a comfortable 14-3 lead that was never relinquished (DRIVE FILM: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/watch/5328#912406).

The game turned into a thrashing in the fourth quarter, as a weary LA team just could not keep up with Albuquerque’s frequent personnel changes and fresh legs. Stated Alb offensive guru Joshua Messina “Those last 20 points in the final quarter was just our little way of saying thanks for another free trip to Disneyland!”

Final score: Albuquerque Nukes 41; Los Angeles (A) 22

BOX: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/box/5328
GAME FILM: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/watch/5328#912357






Currently @ 2033 End of Season
League is in its 16th season.
Custom team options available.

Available Teams: (6)
American Conference
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Baltimore: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/9

National Conference
Dallas: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/17
Los Angeles (N): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/22
Seattle: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/24
New Orleans: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/30

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

Practice Greatness.
League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337

Last edited at 1/16/2022 3:22 pm

Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
1/19/2022 4:42 pm
Currently @ 2034 EFA WK 3
League is in its 17th season.
Custom team options available.

Available Teams: (5)
American Conference
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Baltimore: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/9
Tennessee: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/13

National Conference
Dallas: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/17
Seattle: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/24

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337
Last edited at 1/19/2022 4:42 pm

Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
1/26/2022 8:43 pm
Currently @ 2034 LFA WK 1
League is in its 17th season.
Custom team options available.

Available Teams: (9)
American Conference
New England: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/7
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Baltimore: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/9
Cincinnati: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/11
Cleveland: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/12
Tennessee: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/13
Jacksonville: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/14

National Conference
Dallas: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/17
Seattle: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/24

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337

Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
2/14/2022 6:37 pm
Currently @ 2034 REGULAR SEASON MIDWEEK 2
League is in its' 17th season.
Custom team options available.

Available Teams: (5)
American Conference
New England: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/7
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Tennessee: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/13
Jacksonville: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/14

National Conference
Dallas: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/17
Seattle: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/24

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337

Baaa-haaa, ewe want to join the flock.

Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
3/06/2022 1:29 pm
Currently @ 2034 REGULAR SEASON WEEK 10
League is in its' 17th season.
Custom team options available.

Available Teams: (7)
American Conference
Miami: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/6
New England: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/7
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Baltimore: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/9

National Conference
Dallas: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/17
New York (N): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/18
Seattle: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/24

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337

Baaa-haaa, ewe want to join the flock.
Last edited at 3/06/2022 1:29 pm

Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
3/21/2022 5:26 pm
Assorted greetings and welcome to the 2034 National Football League 2034 playoffs!

Fans are settling into what looks to be an intriguing NFL playoffs - do they max the credit card, or cancel DirectTV? For many, the choice is easy once they find which streaming service (or working pirate link) the game will be on.

The weekend kicks off in sunny Miami Beach as #5 Houston (dfisherman) (10-6) comes to town looking to deep six Miami (7-9). Houston, favored by 3 and led by QB Douglas Wright, failed to make the playoffs in 2034 but is making its 2nd appearance in 3 years.

Saturday’s afternoon game features all the steel ***** a fan could need in a battle between Indianapolis (CrazyRazor) and Pittsburgh (trslick). Underdog Indy (+5) has made steady progress over the last two seasons, again improving on the previous season's win total to finish the regular season at 9-6-1. Granted, it is only a half-game difference and the offshore betting boats are well tilted towards Pittsburgh (9-6-1) and their veteran crew moving into the next round.

The late game for Saturday looks to be an easy one to doze off to as the heavily favored Las Vegas Raiders (raidergreg69) face their division rival in Los Angeles (GranddadB). Vegas (-12) beat LA(A) both times in the regular season with the first game resulting in some memorable “back and forth” for the newspapers. Although bragging rights are currently with LV, it would be a fool’s errand to walk down to one’s bookie and bet all of junior’s college fund against cheeky LA. Looks can be deceiving and LA is built for speed.
Maybe 25% tho…

Jacksonville, which finally acquired new ownership late in the season, has the weekend off as the #1 seed (12-3-1)(ThatBoiJoe23).

Over in the National league, longtime Crown contender Philadelphia (vcr5150) has both feet up after clinching the #1 seed in week 15.

Sunday heats up in Albuquerque (CrazySexyBeast) as cold-weather Chicago (brxnivy) looks to avenge a week 13 loss. It will be an uphill battle for Chicago against the league's best passing attack and the Nuke’s (-9) 29.25 ppg (7.5 points against/g).

The afternoon delight brings the newly dedicated Midtown Murder - under new GM dyluckyguess and formally Atlanta - heading north in an effort to establish a new pecking order against Minnesota (-8)(Gackman). Since acquiring the team during the 2032-33 off season, Gackman has held Minnesota steady and achieved the playoffs twice. It will surely be a great way to break the ice for the mid-afternoon beverages in preparation for the weekend’s closer.

Perhaps saving the best for last and in primetime for obvious reasons, the Dark Horses of Destiny concludes with Dallas (+5) at San Francisco (pparrish1622). Dallas, which was acquired late in the season by dc23, will certainly have to dig in and drill the running game to beat SF. Gold will be found, but whether it will be liquid or lucent has yet to be determined.
That said, both teams could use a little polish.








Currently @ 2034 PLAYOFFS DARK HORSES OF DESTINY
League is in its 17th season.
Custom team options available.

Available Teams: (6)
American Conference
Miami: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/6
New England: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/7
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Baltimore: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/9

National Conference
New York (N): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/18
Seattle: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/24

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337

We've got your flock!
...Right HERE!

Last edited at 3/21/2022 5:36 pm

Re: We Want Ewe!

By CrazySexyBeast
3/29/2022 4:14 pm
2034 NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE CROWN SHOWDOWN

Hello royals and proles alike and welcome to the 2034 National Football League Crown Showdown! As the carts take the dead home and the chariots of the victors thunder upon “somewhere” this Sunday, we find the Las Vegas Raiders (raidergreg69) clashing against Philadelphia (vcr5150).

The Raiders, new to the Crown and in the second year of new ownership, worked their way through Los Angeles (A)(GranddadB) 16-9, Houston (dfisherman) in the New Year’s Eve Evisceration 30-3, and then squeaked by Indianapolis (CrazyRazor) 7-6 on a late 4th quarter touchdown to RB Robert Wright with 4:27 remaining (https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/watch/5659#977257). Having proven they can open it up post to post or settle in for a turf war, LV will be much tougher than the -8 betting line against playoff proven Philadelphia.

Which brings our readers to Philadelphia. Bought by vcr5150 in 2026 and having not missed the playoffs since then, Philly is looking to secure its third Crown in 5 years. Averaging 25 ppg in the 2034 playoffs (7.5 points against) and having cruised through San Francisco (pparrish1622) 31-9 and an unusually sloppy Albuquerque Nuke’s team (CrazySexyBeast) which suffered 10 penalties for 75 yards (regular season league leading average of 4.1/31ypg), Philadelphia seems poised to win yet another league title.

…but not so fast, dear readers.

The Raiders have a real chance to be more than playoff paper tigers. While Philly ran dominant on the scoreboard putting up average offensive numbers throughout the playoffs, the Raiders were offensively dominating every weekend. With a playoff leading rushing attack - and surprisingly so considering Philly led the league throughout the regular season - behind RB Robert Wright (43/240/5.6ypc/0TD), RB James Murphy (39/160/4.1/0TD) and QB Trevor Anderson (56-85/65.9%/349y/3TD/2INT) proving consistent, all Las Vegas needs to do is get the ball into the endzone.

However, Vegas has only been rolling snake eyes when it comes to touchdowns.
This guy is splitting my bets this year. 100$ on Philly to win ATS, 50$ on Vegas outright.

Until next week, this is your obedient, random-generated facsimile of what real sports journalism used to be. All that matters is we planted our cookies in your browser.







Currently @ 2034 PLAYOFFS CROWN SHOWDOWN (TITLE GAME)
League is in its 17th season.
Custom team options available, Admin paid.

Available Teams: (7)
American Conference
Miami: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/6
New England: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/7
New York (A): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/8
Baltimore: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/9
Jacksonville: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/14

National Conference
New York (N): https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/18
Seattle: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/team/24

*Cap can be reset upon request if necessary for new GMs within the first 24 hrs of team ownership. One time offer.

League Home: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/
League Rules/Settings: https://vikings.myfootballnow.com/forums/1/198?page=1#1337

There’s only one way x2
There’s only one waaaaay to FLOCK!
#redrocker
Last edited at 3/29/2022 4:39 pm